Diary of a Madman

Maybe the Gods were England fans and decided to deal me a lousy hand for chortling at the soccer team’s demise in Euro 2004. Or maybe they decided to test our character, just to see how far we could be pushed.
They say moving house is one of the most stressful things you can do, & at a quick count I’ve done it no less than 32 times, so I’m a dab hand at it & rarely phased by the experience. The Secretary has done it twice since leaving home so it was going to be a little more difficult for her.
What we didn’t bargain for is the amount of stuff you amass over the years! All those Cox flyers & used envelopes on my behalf, all that linen & a drawer full of old birthday cards on hers! And this is after we had filtered, skipped, charity shopped loads of stuff & then gone through it all again.
Slammed in the middle of this I had stocktaking in work to contend with (a stress filled experience at the best of times), then one the horses was diagnosed with advanced cancer & we had to put him down on Saturday & buried him yesterday. Plus I had to leg it over to do my monthly slot on Adam’s Show last night. The only reprieve was 3 hours in the company of Stuntface at the Dudley in Rhyl with the added entertainment of some drunk scally in a shirt getting slung out & also Dave Cox being very very drunk at 8.30pm.
So amongst hoardes of boxes we had our first night at Crud Acres. The peace was shattered at 4.30am today by a loud knocking. I awoke with a start, thinking that my nearest neighbour is over half a mile away so who’s calling at this time. The banging was on the bedroom window; it was 2 crows, tapping away. Bastards! They did it incessantly ‘til I got up at 6.15am. Bastards! Couldn’t handle this every morning. Bastards! So first thought was to get some netting & hope the bastards get caught up in it (I wonder what crow pie tastes like?), better thought is to get a fake owl to put on the window sill. Bastards!
Hoping for a longer night’s sleep tonight.<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>

 Chili update – the four of them are sunning thenselves in the conservatory.

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