MARIE'S MUSES

Having been born with a quizzical mind there are certain questions that beg answers, but for which I've never been able to find solutions or satisfying answers to.  Like, why do men always watch television with one hand down their pants and the other on the channel changer?  (Are they afraid to lose control of either one?) How come, when you drop a piece of buttered bread it always lands buttered side down?  (and as a side question, why is it always on a day you haven't hoovered?)  Why are successful pop stars  always good looking as well?  (which comes first the talent or the looks?  do you have to look good to sing good?) How come when people become famous they start to change things about themselves? (lips and breasts immediately spring to mind)  Why are firefighters always gorgeous hunks?  How come baby anything is always so cute?  Ok, here's a really deep one.....ugly rock stars...they always have beautiful babes on their arms?  What's with that? (Ugly boys don't.... does a quitar suddenly make one more attractive?) (On a side note, you never see an ugly rock chick and if you did, I doubt she'd have a handsome man hanging on)  How come you could have no visitors for days and days, but the one day you decide to hang out in your pajamas all day and do nothing around the house everyone decides to come a callin?  Why does the phone always ring as soon as you sit down on the toilet or get into the bath?  How come everything that tastes really really good is really really bad for you?  (chocolate, french fries, donuts, ice cream, cake, cookies, Pie!) Does Yoshi ever get off the Island? (and how did he get there in the first place?) and finally, while I'm at it....which did come first?  The chicken or the egg?

PS...does it hurt to lay an egg?

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