The Apprentice

Want some Apprentice-related gossip from the weekend papers, do you? All right then. But be warned, it's slim pickings. Anybody who's after a string of Sir Alan-related exclusives such as "Katie Hopkins wins Grand National", "Apprentice Raef's dogging shame" or "Lindi Mngaza ate my hamster" will be sorely disappointed.

For example, the best that the Mail stable could come up with was some of its usual anti-BBC sniping masquerading as Apprentice coverage. Apparently, Michael once worked for the publisher of The Apprentice magazine, and Ian occasionally turns up on his local BBC radio station as a football reporter. These whistle-blowing revelations ought to see the BBC being closed down and the show's format sold to Sky One, as anybody with a single digit IQ would agree. Come on Auntie Beeb! How many more of your LIES are we supposed to take? *Foams at mouth*

Meanwhile, in the Daily Star Sunday, a friend of Jenny's leapt to her defence. Yes, everyone! Jenny has a friend! "Last week they probably showed the worst bits of Jenny to make her look bad," mewled Bridget Armiger, who is also Jenny's housekeeper. "She has a very persuasive manner but she is not a bully."

So that's that, then - Jenny is actually a very nice person indeed, and there is not a shred of evidence to suggest that Bridget was 'persuaded' to talk to the papers in order to avoid any nasty little accidents involving her hand and the mangle. It just didn't happen. OK?

Finally, I'm amused to report that Kevin kept locking himself in his bedroom during filming as the other Apprentices kept taunting him for being the spitting image of Daffydd from Little Britain. I can understand his upset, though - it must be a bit rich being mocked for your looks by people who resemble Timothy Claypole or Catherine Tate's drunken estate agent. I'll leave you to work out who I mean.

Tags: The Apprentice, gossip, lookalikes,

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