Why Me?

Where to start – First off weird dreams. I often have long dreams that I can remember in vivid detail (including colours). But what gets me the most is that at the time (whilst asleep) they’re so logical and when you are in the depths of unconsciousness you don’t question it. I’ll set the scene. (Dream sequence – squiggly fade out into non reality)……

**Team night out, at a buffet style restaurant (chic not cheap!!). I can remember all of my colleagues dispersing into rooms within the restaurant, with their clean white plates, off to fetch the meals from where the lovely smells were coming from (I could even smell the food!). I for some reason was behind the rest and watched them slowly disappear (like those silly computer car racing games, when at the starting line, all the others whizz off leaving you standing. (May have something to do with recent Nintendo DS addiction!!) I tried in vain to catch them up and hunt down something lovely to eat. Only every room seemed to be empty of food (also each room had different moods and themes) but people came past me with loaded plates. I eventually found some roasted onions in gravy (why???).

 I loaded my plate and made my way back to my table, only to find when I got back that I had lost my food except the remains of the gravy! So I went back to find more, but seemed to spend hours (probably a nano second) trying to find something left, with various colleagues passing me saying ‘ooh you must try this’. I eventually found a curry room, loaded my plate and headed back to my table (this is where I lost the plot – or my head did). I returned to the table to find everyone had finished and gone home. I asked the waiter if I could finish my meal and he said ‘Not without paying for a new table’ so I said I’d leave it and go. He pipes up ‘You can’t go out the way you came in that’s for paying customers and you madam are not one of those. You’ll have to leave via the turnstiles’. (Confused??).

 I huffed and sighed and made my way to the turnstiles, only to find that to get through them you needed to audition. There was a pirouetting man to my left, who said ‘My main aim is a part in Billy Elliot’. On my right was a singing ten year old (How did I know she was ten??). I began to panic. If I sang they’d never let me out and there was no way I was dancing, not in heeled boots anyway. SO I jumped them (still with a plate of curry in my hand!!). I ran following the signs for the exit. This turned out to be a water slide (I can’t swim). So I’m on a water slide with a plate of curry getting very wet. The water slide was made from blue and white tiles and on the very steep parts had a chicken wire enforced glass screen, to stop you falling out (I’m guessing). Only I can recall that it was green with silt. I thought to myself (bearing in mind my current state) it’s gonna take more than Mr Muscle to shift that (I mean come on as if???). (I’m nearing the end now….) I end up, after a series of twists and slides in a pool, standing still holding the plate, in perfect condition. Then a life guard comes charging over, frantically blowing a whistle, saying ‘Sorry, no food allowed in the pool’. Then I woke up.!!***

If you can get your head around it fell free to comment – But I think cut down on the tea, get earlier nights and leave the DS alone!!!

Well, if telling you about my weird dream wasn’t embarrassing enough, I’ll tell you about my Sunday. My eldest (12) had a football match. Which I was praying to the gods to be off, as anyone in the UK would know it was soggy beyond wet. But wasn’t to be. Hubby had landed a cushy number in the dry at work. So I had the football run, so I went prepared – so I thought. His football pitch is at the bottom of a hill and the car park is at the top. The field / open space between car park and pitch were in three steep steps carved out of the hill. Son runs down, as walking isn’t an option. I stopped at the top and considered it for a second and said, ‘You run along, I’ll find a less steep option’ – as one trip and my new neck would snap and can of worms etc etc. So I’m in wellies so I can brave the thick muddy narrow path which winds its way down the hill. I’m walking VERY gingerly, with every foot it slides beneath me. I eventually make it to what I perceived as levelish ground and regain confidence. Oh how very foolish!!! One more step and I’m a gonna!! Entire left side from elbow to toe is covered in thick, brown, sticky, grass splattered mud. NICE!!! Quick composure and scan of the area to make sure I wasn’t seen. Trouble is you couldn’t miss me covered in mud. I had to make my way to the match, only to receive titters and comments from parents. So I then stood for over an hour in the pouring rain covered in mud. AND to top it all, I had to get back into car only to remember that I had cleaned the seats only last week. It wasn’t my day yesterday.

On the bright side…….I’ll let you know when I think of one.

‘Words of caution, if you open doors to let others in, be sure you have an alternative exit, incase you are let down by their visit’

Love as always – C x

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